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Graffiti |  |
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It was a dark and stormy night, the sort of night when all you want to do is go to the local pub, and stay there. Actually it might not have been; it might have been a summer afternoon or an autumnal evening, but for some reason nobody can quite remember.
Cutting back to the chase, a visit to the toilet[1] was made by one the people present - this was possibly due to the amount of orange juice that was being drunk by the assembled party - (or at least by this Hound, "Beer? What's that?" - me) and during the zen-like moment of contemplation this generally entails, the thought was had. By whom, alas, is lost in the mists of time...
The thought can be summed up thus: "The graffiti in pub toilets[2] is boring"
So the search began to find something slightly more original than the expressions of support for various football teams, the reactions of supporters of other football teams to the first expressions of support for the first teams, and so on...something more geeky, perhaps? Unfortunately, it took several months for the thought to be made code, as a result of temporary amnesia about the thought (and most of the other events of the evening/night/afternoon, as it might have been) the following day.
But at last, it has been brought forth. Actually not forth, but PERL. And C. A short couple of bits of code to scribble on the backs of toilet[1] doors, expressing you views on life far more eloquently than 'Man U FC suck!' ever will. All the time safe in the knowledge that hardly anybody will understand you, and those that do might offer you a job.[3]
So, without further ado, here it is - 90ish bytes of perl or C to enliven the quality time of anyone being seriously ill as the result of over indulgence in the daemon drink. Never touch the stuff myself...
char*a="o isdte
pc!Tx!b;T-!hFw";b(c){putchar(c[a]);}main(c,d){for(c=11;d;b((d=a[++c])/8-4))b(d%8);}
for(@q=qq=Ax!b;T-!hFwo isdte
pc!T==~m~.~gs;$q^10;){print$q[($p=ord$q[++$q])/8+7],$q[($p%8)+11]}
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Spaces and carriage returns being important, of course. 'gcc' (or 'cc') only for the first one - you'll probably be unsurprised to hear the warnings are longer than the code if you add a -W, and it gets antsy about an -ansi. perl -e '<code>' for the second.
Note that nothing on this page is meant to incite criminal acts - it's just a bit of fun. Please do not scribble anything on anything if criminal damage is illegal in your country.
[1] 'Bathroom' for Americans, even though there isn't actually a bath in the average British pub 'restroom'.
[2] 'Bathrooms' for Americans, even though there isn't actually a bath in typical British pub 'restrooms'.
[3] Hint, hint. :)
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Also by this author: If you've enjoyed this
page, you're probably insane. Why not try one of these as well?
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| Comments? Links About | Last modified 03:34 pm, 29/04/03 |
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